Lately, I haven’t been turning on the TV at all unless I have a really good reason to do so. One of the reasons why this is a little easier than usual is the absence of hockey. I love the game, but I’m proudly doing quite well without it, thank you very much.

Someone told me yesterday that the deadline for resolving the conflict is January 18th. I don’t know if that’s true, but in any case, why that day? Because if it resumed any later, they couldn’t fit the season into the remaining time?

Well, I think someone’s just not thinking outside the box.

They could have the hockey season in the summertime, couldn’t they? Imagine watching the playoffs with sangria in hand, fresh from a Jazz fest concert. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’d follow because I care about the game or anything. But I might watch… You know, just to see millionnaires having to work during the fair season.

And even if we absolutely needed to keep the serious business of our national game separate from our fluffy summer entertainment, there are alternatives to scrapping the season. Maybe we could just have the playoffs? Boil the season down to one big-ass round-robin. That would still take too much time? Get rid of that pesky 5-in-7 business. One loss and you’re out. Or maybe they could reduce the games to one period. Something! You know, for those people who care about that sort of stuff. Still not enough time for playoffs? I know! Have just one big shootout. Wouldn’t that be cool!? You know, for the children. I’m thinking of those poor children.

It’s not like I’m in withdrawal or anything. But maybe a yearly season of hockey Tourette’s is part of what keeps me sorta sane.